Commenting on my last post, an old classmate wrote to say “Ram, we are both at an age where we mark the passage of time by composing eulogies for our friends and loved ones. One day someone else will do the same for us….”
True enough. I found that in the past year or so, I’ve done this four times, and each time has been painful in its own way… The passage of the years does indeed makes these occasions more frequent, but every passing is none the easier for that. And every cliché in the book has some ring of truth to it, each day has its own new regrets.
I have been overwhelmed by the several letters that friends from all over the world have written in the past few weeks. And touched by the genuine expressions of grief, by the concern and the affection. I am beginning to respond to these, but each response goes with its own memories, so this note is both to acknowledge how heartwarming it has been to read each message and to say I will write back, but maybe slowly. We will meet, and when we do we will speak of other things, without forgetting this connection.
Sir we know nothing except that we love you very much. What we know is you are my best Teacher……..
I heard about Charu passing away only yesterday when a friend from Santa Barbara mentioned it to me. I have not been able to think of anything else these past 24 hours. I met Charu at UCSB during 1993 I think. She was amazing to be around and took me under her wing. Both from Delhi and from DU as well. She used to come over for dinner a lot and we would chat in Hindi and laugh about all sorts of things. My most vivid memories of her was going to see Cape Fear (Robert DeNiro one) with her and both of us being scared out of our wits. I remember we left the movie half way but came right back in. We decided we would hold hands and get thro the rest 🙂 Another thing that stuck with me was how big her tears were. Bade Bade aasoo I would tease her. She would wonder if she should go back to India. I tried to stay in touch with her after we both left Santa Barbara but guess life got in the way. I am very sad hear about her passing but am so proud of everything she accomplished. I look forward to share about her with my two daughters. I just wanted to share some of my happiest memories of SB with you and pls do let me know if you ever come to the San Diego area. God bless you and your family. Sincerly, Rajasri (Machiraju) Kota
Thanks for your mail, Rajasri, and glad to learn of those shared memories. Santa Barbara was 1991; she had left by 1992. Do get in touch when you come to India-